100 percent of school's first class college-bound

I saw this story on television a few months ago (maybe it was on the Today Show, or Black in America 2, IDK) but I don't think I shared it here. Even if I did, it's worth revisiting. I love seeing young black men going against the status quo, determined to do something with their lives! This is proof that where you're from, how poor you are and what others say/expect are NOTHING when met with positive role models who demand the best, encourage youths to follow their dreams, and give them the tools to be successful. And as a Jacksonian, I am proud that one of these young men will be a Tiger!

Class of 2010 students shown with their red and gold ties, signifying acceptance to at least one college.

Today's randomness: "Smile!"

"Smile! It's not that bad! It'll be okay!"

I hate when people say that.

IMO, this is such an insensitive comment. It brings about so many questions/comments.

1. am I supposed to walk around grinning at nothing in particular? There are people who do that. Lunatics.

2. Who are you, that I should bestow my beautiful smile upon you? Just because you're some guy telling me to smile, I'm supposed to oblige you?

3. You don't know how bad "that bad" is. Downplaying whatever it is that's keeping me from smiling is not the way to cheer me up. If you were really concerned, you'd say "You look down? You okay?" Of course I'd say I was fine (cuz why the hell would I open up to a random stranger?) but that's way better than the "get over it" crap you're giving me.

4. If that's your attempt to holla, you should stop. It's lame.

5. I don't wanna. Now leave me be.

Of course, I don't say any of these things. Think them, and some other unnecessarily mean comments, but never say them. Instead I just flash a brief, fake smile. Because that's what nice girls do, isn't it?

So this is what music has come to?

John Blu- "In Love With Yo Booty"

I was floored when I heard this song. The guy says "Don't turn around 'cuz 'm in love with your back, but if you gotta turn around I hope your face match" and then proceeds to say he's in love with some chick's ass over & over again. Really? So this is what's hot now, huh?

I'm not really a music snob so I don't think it's that (though I do long for a time where it took more than just a tight beat for a song to be considered a hit). I'm certainly not a prude so it can't be that. And I'm too young to be an old fogy who is just out of touch with what's in, right? Well hell, I'll be that if it means not co-signing bullshit like this.

Yanno, I was planning on talking about how today's music is a result of a cyclical problem stemming from society's shift in focus from education to entertainment as a means of making it. How this shift in focus actually harmed the quality of music due to, among other things, the lack of command over the English language (similes, metaphors, subject/verb agreements, etc.).

But... iCan't. Those who get it already get it. Those who don't (or who choose not to) will say I'm hating and continue shaking their asses to it.

SBTS*: The Seattle Cop vs. The Seventeen Year Old

That's "Shouldna Been Talkin' Shyt." Thanks O Hell Nawl.

You can find the article here but to make a long story short: A cop stops a group of young women for jaywalking. Two of the girls get belligerent and put their hands on the cop. The guy tries to restrain one of the girls and when the other walked up on him and... well you saw it. Now people are claiming excessive force and police brutality. Some are pulling out the race card and some think he was wrong to that so-often-twisted adage "A man should NEVER hit a woman."

These people strike me as the same who would blame a teacher for their child slacking off or "the man" for holding them down while not even attempting to look for a job. At some point personal responsibility and common sense have to come into play!

Maybe they have had bad prior experiences with the police, so I understand hostility. I'm no fan of the police myself. However, I know that if I'm stopped, respect and saying the right thing in the right way go far. Because not every officer is evil, there's no reason to be that combative off the bat. Especially not for no damn jaywalking. (C'mon, jaywalking son? When the most you would've gotten was maybe a $50 ticket?) And considering at that point he was the lone officer in a hostile, growing crowd, I'm of the opinion that he had to do something to maintain order & keep her from interfering with him handling the other young woman. Sometimes it pays to just shut up and not try to prove how bad you are...

But maybe I'm missing something... I'd love for those who think the cop was out of line to explain their thinking. Would it have been excessive if it were a man? Or if she were older? If it had been a female cop in the same situation, would the same actions be considered excessive? Would a method such as tasering be considered "less excessive"? If everyone in the situation were the same race, would it have blown up like it did? Someone speak on it!

The Anti-Social Sorority Girl (intro to a growth experience)

The title is from a comment that someone made about me. And thinking about it, I guess it's true; I am a bit anti-social. Way more so than you would think a sorority girl to be. But I need to change that. One because of the career that I chose. If I don't get out there and network my ass off, I won't get started. Two, I'm too young to have this old person's life. Work, school, home is my usual routine... boring! Last, and definitely least, I guess I could go out and see if there is anyone out there who kinda sorta fits what I'd want in a mate. Bitter pessimistic me says no, but it may be interesting to look & see.

So anyway, guess the point is that I'm gonna attempt to be a little less anti-social, put myself out there some, push past my comfort zone. So if/when you see a post that says ASSG, that's what it's gonna be about. There are supposed to be various networking events in & around the city of Jackson soon, so maybe I'll make a little progress.... We'll see!

Traveling with Tori D.

Should any of you ever have the pleasure of vacationing with me, you'd do well to know before hand the rules of engagement. So without further ado:

1. PROPER PLANNING PREVENTS PISS POOR PERFORMANCE
   I am not a "go with the flow" person when it comes to traveling. I want to know well in advance where I'll be laying my head, how I'll be getting there, and a general idea of what I'll be doing so I can pack clothes accordingly. If you are not like that, we may have some problems. The best thing you can do is let me know up front that you suck at planning so I can take care of things myself. But doing stuff like waiting until the day I'm supposed to leave to tell me that the hotel isn't taken care of even though you said you'd do it? Baaaaaad business, my friend. (Plus, that gets over into the issue of trust  honesty & basically breeds a whole lot of resentment.)
2. KNOW HOW MUCH YOU CAN "BALL"
   Maybe you can't ball at all. That's fine. Usually I can't ball either, but when I travel (going back to rule #1) I save money in the months prior to the trip. I scrounge up a few dollars here and there, managing not to spend everything I have. It's just proper planning people! So please don't go somewhere with me if you've got champagne dreams and a beer budget! Now if we doin' beer things & the beer budget is all that's needed, cool. But going somewhere damn near broke? Naaahhhhh, cuz that means you expect me to cover for ya ass. In fact...
3. I DON'T GOT YOU, AND NO YOU'RE NOT GOOD FOR IT
   The bank of Tori D is closed! Run out of business by folks taking out loans and not repaying them! So I can't be the one playing Captain Save 'Em if you're rolling with me. If you don't have enough to eat you'll just be hungry until you get home. If you don't have enough to shop you'll be souvenir-less. If you don't have enough to get back I hope you can find a job & settle in there. My apologies to any future friends who would actually be true to their word & pay me back, but I'm not taking that risk anymore. Shame that one person ruins things for everyone!
4. SOMETIMES, I NEED ME TIME
   Yes, I just need a break from people from time to time. Even on vacation. I'll be okay, you don't have to be all up on me at every turn. I won't go too far. I'll come back in a better mood once I just have a few minutes with no one but me, myself & I. That being said...
5. TRUE TRAVEL BUDDIES DON'T LET OTHER ROAM A STRANGE CITY ALONE... ESPECIALLY NOT AT NIGHT!
   I mean, do I really have to explain this?! The level of unconcern that shows will automatically get you kicked out of the circle of trust. We operate on the buddy system here!
6. DON'T EXPECT ME TO SIT IN A HOTEL ROOM
   Look, I can sit up and watch TV at home, for free! Why would I want to go to another city just to do the same thing? Especially a city I've never been to, and especially if it's a city known for its night life! If you're that much of a homebody, why even bother going on a trip? Have yourself a staycation and be through with it. Don't bother traveling with me!
7. IF WE'RE BUNKING TOGETHER, BE CONSIDERATE
   That means bring air freshener if you know the bathroom is a toxic dump after you're done with it. Try not to get your random body hairs everywhere. Go see a doctor about that sleep apnea (or at least warn a sista so I can get some earplugs). Yanno, the little things.

Alright, I think that's it. See, I'm not a hard person to vacation with! I just wanna make sure I'm having fun just like everyone else. So who wants to go on a trip? I'm taking applications for next year now so that we'll have time to go through the screening process.... LOL

Fight the good fight, or just say "F*** it"?

From reading this blog, y'all probably realize that while I am not afraid of controversial discussions and issues, I am not one of those people who tries to find racism/sexism/etc. in everything. I realize that fucked up things happen to just about everyone, so I'm not quick to yell out "You're a misogynist!" or

whenever I see some unsavory shit that happens to involve a minority. To me, decrying everything as racist, sexist, ageist, unfair, mean, etc. is like the boy crying wolf. Eventually people are gonna stop listening because you never learned to pick your battles and don't know when to STFU.

But sometimes I am tempted to go off and tell people about themselves. Especially when they are spewing horridly inaccurate information that is skewed to make another group look bad. A few weeks ago (when I started this post) it was a white woman on Twitter berating Black women & insisting that we were all herpes-infested whores. Recently it was the ignorance spewed by Slim Thug and the even more ignorant co-signing from other black men.

A lot of sisters have taken to the blogs, forums, Twitter, and wherever else to fight back. And I say good for them. If you have the wherewith all to deal with ig'nant assholes and irrelevant has-beens seeking attention by any means necessary, do so! Someone has to do it. Me? I think I'm just gonna try to ignore ignorance. It's sort of like the "Don't feed the animals" sign at the zoo. You start with one, then the others come along with the same mess, only more over the top to get a more over the top reaction. Eventually someone falls over the rails & the body is never found...

Wait, wat?

Never mind.

Point is, if the controversy comes to me, sure I'll address it. But til then, F it. Stupidity isn't worth the effort to address it. Besides, when arguing with a fool, it's hard to tell who's who.

Things You Shouldn't Do While Drunk

Yeah yeah, we all know you shouldn't drink & drive, and drunk dialing is a no-no. But I have a few other things (in no particular order) that you may wanna wait until you're sober to try...


1. Giving yourself a haircut.
When I did my BC, I was throwed! I'd finished off about a third of a bottle of wine & had several glasses of my new favorite drink (Ciroc red berry & papaya juice. You can thank me later). Needless to say, the cutting didn't go quite as expected (cut too much in some places, not enough in others). On top of that, I couldn't judge how much shampoo I needed... I rinsed my hair at least four times and still had a little left. Finally I said forget it & kept going w/ what I was doing. Fortunately it came out very cute but it probably could've been better if I wasn't blitzed.

2. Mani/pedis.
While in Miami I bought some very cute nail polish and couldn't wait to try them out. Now, I had gone to Wet Willies and had a Call a Cab. Someone should've taken everything from me. Phone, camera, and nail polish included. I really don't even remember doing my nails, but when I woke up the next morning, my left hand had red nail polish all over it. On the right hand, one coat of blue polish barely covered four of my nails, while the thumb remained bare. And my toes? Two of them had been polished red... over a deep purple polish that I'd chipped away. No bueno.

3. Tweeting.
Drunk dialing has never been a problem for me, and I've rarely drunk texted. But tweeting? Maaaaan oh man, that is a whole 'nother issue! I guess it's because I tweet so much that it's pretty much second nature to pic up my phone and go straight to Uber. When I've had a few though, the results are unpretty... Typos galore. And now that the Library of Congress is gonna be keeping record of all of those? I think I'm gonna need a designated tweeter.

4. Doing a presentation of any kind.
This one is from my sophomore year of college. One of my guy friends who I was crushing on was having a birthday party at a friend's house. I went & had several cups of vodka & ______ (I wanna say Hawaiian Punch for some reason). Long story short, I blacked out & can only go by the stories that my roommate told me and the huge knot on my forehead from bumping it against the toilet in my attempts to not upchuck all over myself... which I did. The next day I had a final in one of my business classes. Cool, no problem right? Well my generous professor decided that she would give the students who missed a presentation the opportunity to make it up. Guess who one of those students happened to be? Yours truly. I stood there rambling, still drunk, for what seemed like an eternity. Thank goodness I already had an A in that class, because after that my final grade slid to a B.

5. Walking around on a boat.
I was all disoriented on the cruise... Fortunately I don't get motion sickness... But ummmm yeah, don't do it. That's all I have to say about that!