Quote(s) of the day

I've been on a quote kick this morning. Partially to keep myself motivated, but mainly to interrupt the mind-numbing boredom at work. I've been on AfricanAmericanQuotes.org, gleaning wisdom from some of our most noted leaders, activists, authors, and entertainers.

I am a feminist, and what that means to me is much the same as the meaning of the fact that I am Black: it means that I must undertake to love myself and to respect myself as though my very life depends upon self-love and self-respect.

June Jordan

Sometimes, I feel discriminated against, but it does not make me angry. It merely astonishes me. How can any deny themselves the pleasure of my company? It's beyond me.

Zora Neale Hurston

Every man has a right to his own opinion. Every race has a right to its own action; therefore let no man persuade you against your will, let no other race influence you against your own.

Marcus Garvey

Deal with yourself as an individual, worthy of respect and make everyone else deal with you the same way.

Nikki Giovanni

I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence.

Frederick Douglass

I do not expect the white media to create positive black male images.

Huey Newton, Huey Newton Interview

A spirit of harmony can only survive if each of us remembers, when bitterness and self-interest seem to prevail, that we share a common destiny.

Barbara Jordan

It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences.

Audre Lorde

Action, self-reliance, the vision of self and the future have been the only means by which the oppressed have seen and realized the light of their own freedom.

Marcus Garvey, The Philosophy and Opinions of Marcus Garvey

You are young, gifted, and Black. We must begin to tell our young, “There's a world waiting for you, yours is the quest that's just begun.”

James Weldon Johnson

Don't be afraid to feel as angry or as loving as you can, because when you feel nothing, it's just death.

Lena Horne

A little learning, indeed, may be a dangerous thing, but the want of learning is a calamity to any people.

Frederick Douglass, Address, Washington, D.C

It is not who you attend school with but who controls the school you attend.

Nikki Giovanni

Salvation for a race, nation or class must come from within.

Philip Randolph

We have to talk about liberating minds as well as liberating society.

Angela Davis

I ain't good-lookin', but I'm somebody's angel child.

Bessie Smith, Reckless Blues

Quote of the Day

If you are on Twitter, one person you should be following is @CoachBilal. I admit, I don't always agree 100% with everything he posts, but he will definitely make you stop and think. He provided today's Quote (or Tweet) of the Day:

@CoachBilal: SISTERS: U were BORN with UR HAIR DONE~
UR LIPS Come ALREADY LINED~
UR Cheeks & Skin Already GLOW~
U were Carved By The Infinite Beautician

Is that not beautiful? I think no further explanation is needed on this one :)

(Toxic) Friends, how many of us have them?

The other day I came across an article on Shine titled "9 signs your friend is toxic." I saw a couple of points that were interesting and described the situations that have made me recently re-evaluate my relationship with some of my friends/acquaintances, such as "friends" not being there for you or not having the give-and-take that a friendship should have.

Now, the main thing that has made me look at all the people in my phonebook, FB friend list, etc. is this: What do we have in common? What do we talk about? Do we see things the same, or are we able to have intelligent discussion about the things we view differently?

this is kinda addressed in the article:

5) You don’t share the same values or the same world view: It’s a red flag
that this isn’t the right friend for you if you don’t respect her for who she is.

I've come to realize out of the few people I actually associate with on a regular basis, very few of them share my interests or outlook. and if they do, they keep it under wraps well, because there is never any in-depth discourse about anything of substance. Things such as politics, the treatment of minorities & the poor in this country, education, etc. are passed up in favor of music, shopping, and relationships. Not to say I don't enjoy those things; I do and I talk about them a lot. But where there should be balance in what we share, IMO there is not. Instead, I turn to e-buddies that I've made. These people are definitely dependable when I need a laugh, style recommendations or healthy debate. Maybe it's just because we have a forum to be so random and varied in our conversations, but it definitely makes me wonder "Why aren't my folks here this diverse?" I know there could be any number of reasons, so there's no point in trying to pick out the why of it all.

So what is there to do? As I stated before, I already don't associate with that many people. Do I adhere to the Girl Scout song and make new friends while keeping the old, because "one is silver and the other's gold"? (BTW, I never got which one was supposed to be silver & gold. And is one supposed to be better than the other? And since I like silver over gold would even care that much about the "gold" friends? I digress.) Should the commonality of being in BGLOs or having grown up together be enough to hold on, or is it okay to say "Our time has passed, it was fun while it lasted" and move on? I think we (especially women) are taught to hold on to friends as "friends" even when we've outgrown them or don't have much interaction with them. After all, that would make us "funny-acting" or mean that we weren't a true friend in the first place.

I'm not sure, but hopefully through reflection I'll figure out what directions these various relationship will take. After all, the people you associate with should be a reflection of who you are. I'm not seeing anything in the mirror at this point.

"Dear White Women" (An open letter)

Dear White Women,

Before you begin reading this letter, I encourage you to discard the ghetto, attitude-laced, stereotypical "angry black woman" voice you may hear in your head. This is not that type of letter. Instead, think of it as helpful advice; a sort of "The more you know" moment.

There are several things that I think we need to clear up. Things that you do that come off.... well, a bit racist. Now I'm sure you don't intend for it to seem that way. You probably even have black friends! And that's good for you. However, for those who you don't know, there are some things to keep in mind. Here are a few of them:

1. Nobody wants your cheap, ugly purse. Okay, maybe someone does, but the majority of us, including ME, do not. So if I happen to sit two seats down from you in the waiting room at the doctors office, there's really no need to immediately grab your purse and clutch it for dear life. Even if you had a HOT Prada or something, chances are you're pretty safe in that setting, what with the camera and dozens of people around. That move makes you look like you believe all black people are horrible, violent monsters who want nothing more than to knock you over and take your raggedy bag of mints and tissue. And you don't really think like that, do you? Of cooouuurrse not. So do better, 'kay?
2. Making statements like "It's too many of them" when in a crowd of black people makes you look crazy and will get you all kinda side-eyes. Since this was an elderly lady, I'll try to just chalk it up to dementia or something. But um, get ya Nana when you're out in public.
3. I am not trying to take your black boyfriend/husband/boo/baby-daddy. Neither am I mad that you're with a black guy. That being said, what's with the mean-mug? Next time, unless something is said or done, save it boo.
4. No, you cannot just come up to me and touch my hair!! Self-explanatory.

I hope you find these tips useful. They may just help you get along a little better next time you happen to interact with someone of another race, no matter how frequent that may or may not be. :)

Sincerely,

Tori I was nice this time D.

Some females make it hard for good women

After watching these two clips, I am almost speechless. This woman's stupidity is baffling to me. Just like usually a woman scorned becomes jaded, so do men. Women like this are poison. Harsh, but true. And I wouldn't be surprised if she was one of those females who always laments that there are no good (black) men out there. SMH Just watch.

I'm Not Feeling It

I'm at home today, partially because I didn't feel all that great this morning; partially because I found zero motivation to get up and go to work. I am absolutely drained! So instead, I'm working on stuff for class (kinda... it's a slow process), resting, and reflecting on some things. Main thing I've realized is that I can't count on other people for my happiness and well-being. If I want to be happy, it's solely on me. Although it's nice to turn to them, I can't count on friends, family or my boyfriend for that. Eventually there comes a time when they aren't around and you gotta make it happen for yourself...

IDK, I'm rambling and not making much sense. I'm feeling so many ways right now and its coming out a big jumbled mess. I'll try this again later. :-/